Sunday, March 15, 2009

Nice One Parade

Parade translated. From page 2, March 15,2009 edition.

Question: Is it right for Hollywood to pass judgement on someone like Jessica Simpson for gaining weight? - Penny Scales, Palm Harbor, Fla.

Translation: Could y'all stop being assholes for like....two seconds?

Answer: We get your point.
Whine bag...

But after appearing for years in neckline-plunging dresses and midriff-baring short-shorts, Jessica has fallen prey to that old Hollywood saying, "Those who live by the camera die by the camera."
First off, no we can't stop being assholes. Secondly, 'no-talent' had it coming. Time to put on a turtle neck and some sweatpants.

Find out how stars- including Reese Witherspoon and Leonardo DiCaprio-deal with the spotlight at Parade.com/spotlight.
Isn't everyone tired of living vicariously through Jessica yet? Here are some substitutions that don't whine as much as her.

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