Saturday, May 7, 2011

Of Concerts And Collisions

I heard that Bowling For Soup was in my hometown today via a tweet from the lead singer. Also that tickets would be 15 dollars at the door, very close by at the Bourbon Street Ballroom. Well actually I thought it was the Sonar at first. I misread the tweet. I immediately called the work wife to see if she wanted to go and she said she was sick but would try if she could. After some miscommunication and wonderings of why Sonar wasn't answering their phone since I had a question about the tickets (They lost their liquor licence for the next two weeks because it wasn't renewed. Bowling For Soup somehow pulled a rabbit out of a hat and got to play at Bourbon.), I finally figured out where it would be. I tried to get people to go with me but everyone was either sick or couldn't go. So I called my gay and told him I'd pick him up and pay for the ticket because he's a broke bitch.

Turns out he's in Aberdeen 30 minutes away. Nice going. It's already 6:45 and I have to get gas and money and the concert starts at 7pm. Smart chick that I am, I'm still going by Sonar's schedule and completely forgot that the Dollyrots would probably not be opening for them since it was canceled and then moved. I race all over to get my check cashed as fast as possible. I race to my friend's house, get both him and his boyfriend who wanted to tag along, and back. It starts storming so bad I can hardly see as we get closer to Baltimore, but I am determined. We get extremely close to there and then we got lost because my GPS is a piece of crap and there was no parking. However some nice hippy looking folks told us where free parking was and pointed us to the venue up the street.

We get there and it stopped raining, which was great since it was an outside place on top of a roof. Also there was no line, which should have given me my first clue that something was wrong. It is now 9pm. We walked up at least 5 flights of steps and had to pay full price at the door to be told the concert would be ending at 9:30pm. What kind of fucking dick move is that?! If you only have 15 minutes of concert time you should not have to pay full price! Part of me wanted to leave, but I heard Jaret's voice and thought 'I did not go through all of this, drive for an hour and a half to turn away now!' So I payed full price for everyone. Good thing was that there weren't that many people there So I was about 5 feet from the stage.

It was only Chris and Jaret up there singing that I could see. My camera phone is shitty and only takes 31 second movies (Why!!!), but I got to see their last song '1985' and take two videos. Warning: They are of crappy quality, seriously. You will not really see Jaret in these videos and I apologize. For clarification, the blur on your left will be Chris and the blur on your right will be Jaret. Also, the last time I posted a video it seems that a commenter didn't understand that you can scroll to the bottom of my page and turn off the music player. I hope that clears things up. Just turn it off. I assume you're all literate and competent enough to do that without me going into detail on how.

I was in heaven for the next 15 minutes and cheered and woo'ed like I had been there the whole time. When they finished they walked off stage and to the left and back. I tried to get to Jaret in time to ask for a hug or an autograph, but I couldn't and they were gone. Saddened I went back to my gay and his boyfriend and laughed as they told me it was the best 5 minute concert ever. We were getting ready to leave when I turned around and exclaimed 'This is so horrible'. This caught the attention of a man walking by (Who now that I think about it, may have been the tour manager Dave Hale, but I'm really not sure. He had half white hair and half brown in a little mo hawk like do. If anyone knows if that was him or not, please clarify for me.). He asked me how I was and I said OK and he said I seemed upset about something. So in my little sad sack voice I told him how I really wanted a hug and a picture with Jaret, but that he had gone and I didn't get to him in time.

He points to where there were apparently restrooms that I hadn't seen before and says, "Oh it's OK, he's right there. Come on, I'll get you to meet him." ....Holy shit (You also think I would have figured that the band stays around for at least a little while to sign things for fans and they hadn't actually left yet, but I'm a blond underneath all this red.). I walked over and he taps Jaret on the shoulder and tells him when he's done with the people he was talking with, I wanted to meet him. The man tells me not to be nervous as I wait patiently and try not to look too much like a Chihuahua that needs to go to the bathroom. Than about a couple of seconds later Jaret turns to me and says hi and I ask for a hug and a picture and told him I loved his music. He was so sweet...and he smelled really good too. I'll admit that I almost cried when I hugged him. Then we got interrupted and he kind of forgot about my picture for a moment because someone else came up for a picture.

But Jaret was so sweet that when I stood there and waited for it to be done and for a lull in conversation he agreed (again) for a picture. I also think I may have creeped him out a little. You see, my camera phone is really shitty and needs lots of light for pictures because for some reason the flash doesn't work on it. I don't know why. When I asked my friend, as Jaret was taking a picture with another fan, where we could take the picture, some random man told me to go into the bathroom since there was a lot of light and that's what one of the previous fans (male) had done.

Jaret turns around and I exasperatedly tell him, "My phone has no flash and I think I need to take you into the bathroom for the light." He gets this 'say what?' look on his face (Which is understandable, because it is very odd to hear a female fan ask to go into the bathroom with you when you are a male celebrity. I however was not thinking at the moment because I was still star struck.) and points to a bright sign and walks me over to it, with his arm around me and poses for a picture with me. I then told him thank you and that he rocked and double high fived him...kind of...he had a beer in one hand. I wanted so badly to buy a beer and hang around with the other fans, maybe talk to him a bit more and just tell him how much I loved his band, how great I thought they were, how whenever I'm down listening to their music always makes me happy again. Unfortunately I really had to get my friend home and didn't have time to. I also wanted to be less weird and awkward; but that's not happening anytime soon.

On the way to take my friend home we were rear ended. There were these people that looked like they were crossing the street. From where I was they were indeed kind of out in the street instead of on the median where they fucking belonged. I slowed down and actually stopped and was motioning for them to either run across or get the fuck out of my way so they didn't get hit...and that's when it happened. I heard the screech of a car braking quickly, looked into my rear view mirror and saw the collision. The two pedestrians looked, said "holy shit!" and then bounced as me and this man pulled into a gas station. Thank you fellow Baltimorons....thank you a lot. Thankfully he didn't hit me hard at all and only his fender was slightly dented and my beautiful Thelma had no damage whatsoever. So my lucky ass gets to deal with that tomorrow.....and pay my late insurance

But you know what? It was so worth it just to meet one of my favorite singers.


  1. 15 bucks for tickets to a show are pretty good!

  2. Of course it was worth it -- salute yourself on the effort and thank God for the payoff! Love it ~~


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