Wednesday, December 4, 2013

And I Promised Myself I'd Never Be Lazy Again...

Wow, a month. Nice.

Being as I do not have access to pictures because I'm at work, I can't blog what I wanted to originally blog...a month ago. So that will have to wait. However, I just can not sit by and let my blog wither away into procrastination land. I also wanted to take advantage of the fact that ever since my workplace switched computers and software, no one has noticed that the employees can get on the internet from their cubicles. I think I'm the only one that has figured out that all the blocks are down so far. Probably because I'm the only one who gets bored enough to dick around on the internet knowing full well that you can't do anything on it besides get onto client websites...well until now that is.

I thought I'd leave you with a mention that I'm still alive, a sorry for not updating, and some random thoughts gleaned from spending 8 hours here all alone at night, 3 nights a week. Such a cop out post, I know.

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Sometimes I wonder how appropriate it would be to create envelope art for the debt companies I owe to with the words 'Fuck you' hidden throughout the art. What would be even funnier is if they thought it was pretty enough to keep and hang up somewhere for everyone to see.

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When I hear people talking from behind a door or from far away, it totally sounds like they're talking Simlish from the Sims. When I hear them get excited I can't help but picture them with a green diamond above their heads and flailing their arms around. Then I wonder if they have red minuses or green pluses above their heads.

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I want to know how much trouble I could honestly get into if I stole a book from Ikea.

I went with my friends and in the room setups they just have random books. They're not for sale, they're just props donated by people to use throughout the fake rooms. They get no revenue for them and the lines are self checkout, what could they possibly do? I'd pay them if they let me. Some are in a different language (it's mainly Ikea language), and that's just neat. ....And this is how you know my book obsession has gone too far.

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Sometimes I don't think I'm real. Then sometimes I think I'm too real. Or maybe I should say there are instances in which everything is not so much hyper realistic, but hyper realized.

For instance, once when I was younger I was sitting on my grandma's couch, watching a movie. I was kind of spacing out and drawing, looking up every so often to check on the plight of the main characters. I had a pear in front of me as a snack. I stopped drawing to take yet another bite and it was like I was eating it for the first time. Like I was seeing everything for the first time.

It's somewhat hard to explain. It feels like an alien being has taken over you and is just experiencing life. Everything is so new and odd, even though you've experienced it before. You go into a sort of daze. It's usually not too long.

After I had come back to myself, sometimes I would touch things or eat food that was before me to see if I would feel that way again. I wouldn't. That would just perplex me until I shrugged it off and forgot about it.

Like I said, it's weird. I wonder if anyone has ever experienced that before.

4 comments:

  1. Glad you're back! I disappeared for a while, too. Definitely spreading myself too thin b/c I'm on Tumblr now. Oy that's a timesuck. But its so much easier to find a picture or gif or reblog that captures what I want to say instead of using an entire work day to write out a blog post (I got zero work done today. literally nothing. blogging is legit gonna get me fired)

    Anyway...I've noticed those Ikea books too. Odd that they're real books and not cardboard props but maybe they think no one will steal them b/c they're written in Swedish (side note: I would.... I nearly started to learn Swedish once b/c of a band called Kent. long story) Maybe Swedes are a very trusting people? The crime rate up there is like microscopic. Also, I used to be addicted to all the Sim City games but never played the Sims. Weird, huh?

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    1. "But its so much easier to find a picture or gif or reblog that captures what I want to say" I swear to Christ this is why I'm addicted to pinterest. I use it as Tumblr.

      Not all the books are Swedish, a bunch of them are written in English, or at least they were in the Ikea I went to. I jokingly asked one of the workers if I would get in trouble for taking one and he said he couldn't do anything because he worked in a certain area and the area I had just walked out of wasn't where he was working.

      I think he basically gave me the go ahead to take one but I was too chicken to do it.

      I'm so the opposite of the sim city games. I could never get into them, but I can waste a week playing Sims. Weird. :p

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  2. It seems the "I'm still alive" post is becoming more and more popular amongst blogs I enjoy(ed). Usually it's the precursor to "I just don't have time for this anymore, buh-bye." Don't let this happen to you, please.
    I think for the next bill I pay, I'll be creating artful "fuck you" messages.
    Keep it real.

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    1. Don't worry my little pickle, I'll never leave. I just can't quit you guys. lol.

      Hell yes to keeping it real with debt companies. Just be careful you don't become an example of when keeping it real goes wrong. :p

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