Friday, May 5, 2017

30 Day Letter Challenge: A Stranger And Your Ex Lover or Crush

Dear Woman In Ollie's,

Do your eyes work? Better yet, does your mouth work? 

Ok, so I know that I was a bit distracted but in my defense those peeps plushies were huge, cute, and on sale....and I was walking at a snail's pace. It's not like I cut you off dashing like a madman to the check out line. Also in my defense, you totally saw my cart and me coming. I know because when my paranoia senses were kicking in and I turned, you were inches from crashing into me and my cart. When I looked over I was met with the smile of the clueless and the dead eyes of a bargain shopper staring directly into my soul. 

I'm just saying you could have said excuse me or something to warn me.

Dear Maryland Drivers As A Collective,

I'm not sure if you've noticed lately, but did you know that your blinkers aren't working? I'm sure the fact that you all keep cutting me off is just a big coincidence and a huge misunderstanding. There's no way you're all this moronic and a trip to your local mechanic is sure to get this problem fixed. Also, when the light is red, it means stop. Not gun it. Just a little driving fact you didn't know.

Oh, and when you're at a four way stop, you're supposed to take turns in a clockwise manner and usually the person who gets there first is the first to go. Another driving tip you don't seem to know either. 

Dear Theresa,

 I should have listened to you when you told me you were too broken. I should have listened to you when you warned me that your ex called you a demon. 

I just thought your ex was a bitch. I thought two broken people could make one whole person, not one shattered individual left behind. I didn't know. I was in love.

Even still, there are no words or excuses for the hell you put me through. One flash in the pan relationship and it took almost ten years away from my life to recover from it. I can hardly remember my twenties because I spent so much of them crying in my room, cutting and self harming, and sleeping my life away. It was the closest I had ever been to truly being ok with dying. I lost my religion, I lost my path, I lost myself. I'm still finding odd pieces of myself here and there even though I have largely gained everything back. 

Sometimes I wish there was an Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind type company out there so I could wipe my memories of you away. But then I would be erasing the strength and resolve I found at the end of my fall. I would be erasing the clarity and the wisdom. So I'll have to live with the fact that you are in the recesses of my memories and sometimes you'll resurface.

I wish that I was one of those people who wished well on the people that wronged them or abused them. Sometimes I can be.

Not with you though.

I forgive you, but I can't wish you well. I had to pretend that you were dead in order for me to truly begin getting over my anger and sadness. Sometimes I still do. I no longer feel much of anything towards you. I forgive you but I hope you got your karma. I really do. 


I didn't mean to skip another day, but I got so stumped on the stranger one. I was going to write five small open letters to various people, but I thought two was enough. No need to make this post longer than it should be. 

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